Paralyzed From the Brain Down - April 3, 2020

To say the past weeks have been weird is an understatement. I have been trying to work from home, but it's difficult. What's worse is that I'm home more, but am completely unable to paint! I'm paralyzed and I can't figure out what's wrong. My husband says all psychological problems are inherently fixable if you can articulate what the problem is. So when I can't articulate it, I feel worse, like it's only ME standing in the way of feeling better. If only I were smarter.
One fun thing is that my siblings and I are all talking more online. Yesterday we had the best conversation because one never-available-when-we-group-call sibling actually took part! Unfortunately, they also got mad when I took a (lot) screenshots. I touched up one of the screenshots to show how they should really feel about me. 

I'm thinking of downloading some filters for my next meeting at work and looking like the potato lady I can't stop laughing at this picture. 

And laugh…

It's Friday! It's Friday! - March 27, 2020

I've now been working from home for an entire week.

By noon today I was feeling really antsy - after checking in with coworkers, we found that we were ALL feeling antsy. It's strange working from home - it's like being in a candy shop while on a diet. You are surrounded by wonderfulness that you can't enjoy! I'm home, but not allowed to do homey things.

On the other hand, I am very grateful to be employed and getting a paycheck right now. :(

At 4:30pm sharp, I closed out my email, X-ed out Microsoft teams and got off of every website that had to do with work. I turned on my glue gun and worked a bit more on my flower ball.

This sucker is HUGE. I found some typing paper from decades ago - it's a beautiful texture, kinda scratchy and thick. It's a beautiful, creamy white color. I cut it into squares forever ago and had a huge stack that I thought would make a beautiful piece.

It's bigger than my head, bigger than a basketball, bigger than .... ?


It's a Start- March 26, 2020

Put one foot in front of the other...

Alive and Barely Breathing - March 25, 2020

I've learned that I don't art in times of uncertainty.  Does that make me less of an artist? I don't think so.

I've finished five of the twelve pieces for this kusudama flower ball. It might take a little while to get it done, but when I  do, it's going to be magnificent! 

Confusion- March 20, 2020

Today I packed up my workplace and brought it home. Even though my library system was shut down on Tuesday, I expected to be able to come in and work at my computer since I'm usually all alone down there. No such luck. The governor's shelter-in-place edict last night changed everything. My boss gave me permission to go in & get supplies for other staff to empty book drops during the shutdown. I gathered up my things and took out 4 bags of stuff. (Yikes - imagine when I actually retire and really leave!). It's still in my living room.

I set the alarm & dead-bolted the door. I've dreamed of having time to get things done & this is that dream come true. Well, actually, it's a tiny bit nightmarish...
I've not understood nor entertained the idea that this situation was as serious as it's being made out to be. Will we be gone a week? A month? Can it possibly be longer? How can that be real?

Sometimes I'm a little dramatic - that's the eldest …

A Poem for Today - March 19, 2020

Keeping Quiet
Now we will count to twelve and we will all keep still for once on the face of the earth, let's not speak in any language; let's stop for a second, and not move our arms so much.
It would be an exotic moment without rush, without engines; we would all be together in a sudden strangeness.
Fishermen in the cold sea would not harm whales and the man gathering salt would not look at his hurt hands.
Those who prepare green wars, wars with gas, wars with fire, victories with no survivors, would put on clean clothes and walk about with their brothers in the shade, doing nothing.
What I want should not be confused with total inactivity.
Life is what it is about...
If we were not so single-minded about keeping our lives moving, and for once could do nothing, perhaps a huge silence might interrupt this sadness of never understanding ourselves and of threatening ourselves with death.
Now I'll count up to twelve and you keep quiet and I will go.
- Pablo Neruda

I am poet…